• June 20, 2021

Exclusive: Newsmax turned Matt Gaetz down for a job, further humiliating the concupiscent putz

 Exclusive: Newsmax turned Matt Gaetz down for a job, further humiliating the concupiscent putz

Nice to see that Newsmax draws a line somewhere. They’re all-in on trashing our democracy and propping up Hitler’s least charismatic ass polyp (which has since metastasized into a giant ocher fart golem that can’t accept it’s just a fart in the wind), but I guess (allegedly) trafficking underage girls is a bridge too far.

That said, Newsmax has no problem having Gaetz on its shows:

Interviewed in May by Newsmax, Gaetz said: “The anonymous allegations against me range from total distortions of my life to these crazy and wild conspiracy theories that will never be proven, but they always come for the fighters.”

The fighters? Is that what you call mocking mask-wearing on the floor of the House in order to undermine public confidence in government health guidance? Fighting? There’s lots of killing involved, but I don’t see a whole lot of “fighting.”

That said, there is plenty of squirming going on.

Gaetz’s BFF and partner-in-grime, Joel Greenberg, recently pleaded guilty to trafficking a 17-year-old girl, and Gaetz is currently under investigation for allegedly paying the same girl for sex

Maybe Gaetz thought that having his own Newsmax show would somehow shield him from public scrutiny. That said, he shouldn’t lose all hope. If he beats the rap—he is a powerful white man from a wealthy family, after all—Newsmax will probably offer him a nightly two-hour slot. Assuming he doesn’t want to stay in Congress to … keep doing whatever it is he does.

It made comedian Sarah Silverman say “THIS IS FUCKING BRILLIANT” and prompted author Stephen King to shout “Pulitzer Prize!!!” (on Twitter, that is). What is it? The viral letter that launched four hilarious Trump-trolling books. Get them all, including the finale, Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump, at this link. Just $12.96 for the pack of 4! Or if you prefer a test drive, you can download the epilogue to Goodbye, Asshat for the low, low price of FREE.

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Reporters Team

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